The general synopsis at 0600 UTC - Cyclonic 5 or 6, decreasing 4 at times.

I don't want to speak too soon, but the postal system here in Norway seems to have gotten a lot better this year, Mothers little food parcels are arriving within a couple of days, Izzys iPad came in 3 and my new coffee machine got here quicker than I did! Who knows how and why but lets no knock it. On that note, I'm trying to organise some rubber fendering for the boat, My best mate Wayne has found some from a company in Cambridgeshire but the fun and games he is having getting it to France is beyond a joke, Firstly I ordered a courier to collect it from their warehouse, when he turned up it wasn't ready (how long does it take to cut 9M of rubber) the 2nd attempt there was no label attached so he left again and the 3rd he was told it had already been dispatched! - I'll keep you posted if it ever turns up.

I need some fendering for Isabella as she is getting a little bashed up now, yesterday for instance, we experienced some crazy winds here in Ulvik, the drive over to the hotel was scary enough as she was flying out of the water at the crest of the wave and crashing down again as though I was riding a jet ski! After my hotel visits I noticed a ton of debris floating outside the green cafe, as I approached it turns out to be thousands of pounds worth of patio furniture that had blown into the fjord. I tried the best I could to rescue as much as possible but can you imagine trying to haul a chair with one hand whilst steering with the other and using your knee to control the throttle and your head the gears! - I guess some would see the funny side, especially with 3 foot waves chucking me around like a rag doll! Well after 5 chairs and a table safely ashore and the 6th chair falling back on top of me, smashing the windscreen, it was time to give up and go home! Even that was futile, the waves were crashing the boat against the quay so I decided to go back to the Brakanes Hotel and leave her there for the day. At least she could bob about in the open water until it all calmed down. And as if by magic the winds dropped and the water calmed just as the football finished, nice little ride home, even if Germany had just destroyed Greece.

I have discovered that the bar in the Ulvik hotel not only has the football on wide screen but I get staff prices too, meaning the beer is only twice the price of the UK and not 4X. It also has a better type of clientele even if they all support the 'other team' no matter who is playing.

Well thats about it for now, I'm preparing and looking forward to Sundays match against Italy, Who knows, we might make another stage of the game....

Gjør en annen mann en tjeneste

God Morgen

I guess since I have been back in Ulvik for three weeks now I should fire up the blog again. Everything has settled down nicely and the resort is ticking over well, Izzy has just turned 30 so we decided to throw a party on Saturday and invite her closest friends from Ulvik to come along. You could say it was my first proper Norwegian / Swedish party experience, one I won't forget in a hurry. What with Reidun and Ingrid serving Moet from their ample cleavages,

To George & Therese singing the National Anthem standing on one leg!

Young Trine and Max introducing us to some bizarre Swedish pop music and Vaiva's 'Interesting' birthday cake.... In true Norwegian style they bolted down the Vodka / Champagne / Cider & beer then shot off to the pub for a pint and 8 straws. Unfortunately for me it was a school night so I stayed back, cleaned up and crashed out.

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Isabella (the boat) is now perfect, some adjustments to the positioning of the fuel tank giving her a better weight distribution and able to 'plane' much more easily and some more tweaking to the engine, she now runs like a dream and I often 'go to work' in her. It takes me 20 minutes to walk to the hotel, 5 minutes to drive (from leaving the house to entering the hotel) and only 3 minutes by boat. My next door neighbor, Frode, has kindly let me moor her right outside my apartment on his moorings and both of my hotels have landing platforms to tie up to. Perfect.

So confident I was with her performance, I decided to take her for a long spin although I did bottle out at the T Junction to Osa & Bergen, I had enough fuel and she was running well, I just felt that if something did pack up, it would be a bloody long 'paddle' back as I was already 5 miles out! I think I'll stick to using her for 'work' use for now.

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Sunday 27th May and I get a bizarre phone call from the Brakanes, It turns out one of their clients was arriving by boat and had run out of fuel a couple of miles from the hotel and was drifting aimlessly down the Hardanger Fjord. Would I mind going to help them? Jumping at the chance to save another mariner I fired up all 12.5 horses under Isabella's bonnet and proceeded to cruise up the Fjord in search of the stricken vessel. I must admit, when I saw her I was a little concerned, she was a massive day boat with a 90HP engine and a family of 6 on board who had traveled from Bergen to Ulvik in this thing, only to run out of fuel 2 miles from port. As i approached they threw me their bow line and I hitched her up to my grab handles. It was a struggle for my tiny craft but within the hour I had successfully towed her into the harbor. Good deed done for the day but I was a little miffed by the fact they didn't even say thank you! - Googling 'salvage rights' technically their boat is now mine as they threw me the line..... I'll keep my eyes open if I ever see them again!

Oh well, in the words of our famous local poet, Olav H Hague, "Do another man a favor" It can't hurt

Isabella doing what she does best....